Secrets Web Writers Don’t Want You to Know!

Which headline would you click on:

Are You Thrifty?
or
Are You A Tightwad? 

Bill Maher, host of HBO’s “Real Time with Bill Maher” recently wrote in the New York Times:

“New Rule: Internet headlines have to be more like newspaper headlines. That means they have to tell me something instead of just tricking me into clicking on them. If you write the headline, ‘She Wore That?’ you have to go to your journalism school and give your degree back.”

Commercial sites are about aggrating eyeballs; the more people click around a site, the greater the ad revenue.

Thus a headline captioning a photo of Justin Bieber that the legitimate media would write as,

Justin Bieber on Wilshire Boulevard

Might become on the interweb,

Justin Bieber Strides Right Past Fans!

Here are headlines Yahoo and other sites ran this week, and more accurate rewrites:

Kathy Griffin Shocks David Letterman
(Kathy Griffin Completes Staged Bit on Late Show While Dave Makes Faces of Mock Surprise.)

Rihanna’s Outrageous Bikini Styles
(Rihanna Wears Unusual Bikinis} 

Controversy Erupts Over…
(People Are Discussing…)

Actress Stuns in Lacy Dress at Premiere
(Actress Photographed by Photographers Paid to Photograph Actresses)

Billionaire’s Shocking Riches to Rags Fall
(Wealthy Man Loses Money)

Taylor Swift’s ‘earth-shattering’ Heartbreak
(Taylor Swift Quite Disappointed)

Soccer Player’s Stunning Scoring Spree
(Soccer Player Scores Many Goals)

11 Habits that will help you live to 100
(Statistically, You Won’t Live To Be 100, But This Could Help You Live A Little Longer)

College Majors That Are Useless
(These College Majors Often Lead to Fewer Job Prospects)

Come to think of it, if you really want web traffic, why not…

Billionaire 100-Year Old Actress with Useless College Degree Stuns at Soccer Game in Earth-Shattering Bikini, Shocking David Letterman! 

Controversy erupts.

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